Opambata, Eyo o!

Lagos Laws: Alms to beggars, loittering & littering can lead to jail.

Giving of alms to beggars – 1 month imprisonment. Wandering in any premises – 3 month to 1 year imprisonment. Suspected thief with no proven means of livelihood, 3 months to 1 year imprisonment. It is an offence to dispose of scrap papers, newspapers, sweet wrappers, fruit skins, water sachets or similar refuse anywhere except little bins within the Lagos Central Business district. Offenders will be liable to a fine of not less than N1, 000.00

Just imagine me, cruising my nano, ‘jeje-ly’, it’s hot and my a/c is blowing flames so I decide to feel the cool breeze only cos as hungry as I am, Gala has been banned, I’m watching out for “red” bikes coming too close too, cos LagosMet said it’s not safe (security-wise), Just in front of me, I see a “check point”, my heart is beating fast cos I left home without my license,  I narrowly escaped and see a child beggar right in front, another trying to clean my windscreen, I decide to help (not that kind of lagos erotic help o!) and then remember that I could end up in jail this very night… yet Lagos is not the worst place to work. Joor oh! Mi o le fi handcuffs she bracelet o!

THE PUBLICATION

In the initiative to re-enforce Law and Order around the Lagos Central Business District, the Lagos State Government hereby draws the attention of the general public to the following PUBLIC DISORDER OFFENCES, contained in the CRIMINAL CODE AND ENVIROMENTAL SANITATION LAW 2003 LAWS OF LAGOS STATE and the sanction that maybe imposed upon conviction.

1    BEGGING FOR OR GATHERING OR COLLECTING ALMS IS PROHIBITED WITHIN THE LAGOS CENTRAL BUSINESS DISTRICT:

1    Outer and Inner Marina
2    Broad Street
3    Balogun Street
4    Martins Street
5    Nnamdi Azikiwe Street
6    Eko Bridge
7    Carter Bridge
8    Apongbon Street
9    Idumagbo Avenue
10    Campbell Street
11    Breadfruit Street
12    Tinubu Street
13    Abibu Oki Street
14    Oke Olowogbowo Street
15    Davis Street
16    Adeniji Adele Street
17    Church Street
18    Docemo Street
19    Odunlami Street
20    Iga Idunganran Street
21    Ereko Street
22    Kakawa Street
23    Campos Street
24    Bamgbose Street
25    Alli Balogun Street
26    Ehingbeti (Marina Foreshore)
27    Ebute Ero
28    Force Road
29    King George Road
30    All Flyovers in Lagos Island

It is an offence to give alms to any person begging for alms within the Lagos Central Business District.

Offenders will be liable to one (1) month imprisonment and suffer punishment for subsequent offences.
www.LagosMet.com
2    Every Person found wandering in or upon or near any premises or in any road or highway or any place adjacent thereto or in any public place within the Lagos Central Business District at such time or under such circumstances as to lead to the conclusion that such a person is there for an illegal or disorderly purpose shall be deemed to be a rouge or vagabond and is guilty of a misdemeanor and is liable to imprisonment for three (3) months and one (1) year upon subsequent conviction.
3    Every suspected person or reputed thief who has no visible means of subsistence and cannot give an account of himself found within the Lagos Central Business District shall be deemed to be a rouge or vagabond and is guilty of a misdemeanor and is liable to imprisonment for three (3) months and one (1) year upon subsequent conviction.

1.    Extortion by tout or miscreants is prohibited on all streets within the Lagos Central Business District.

2.    LITTERING OF THE STREETS WITHIN THE LAGOS CENTRAL BUSINESS DISTRICT IS PROHIBITED.

It is an offence to dispose of scrap papers, newspapers, sweet wrappers, fruit skins, water sachets or similar refuse anywhere except little bins within the Lagos Central Business district. Offenders will be liable to a fine of not less than N1, 000.00

3.    DEFECATING OR URINATING IN THE DRAINAGE OR OPEN SPACES WITHIN THE LAGOS CENTRAL BUSINESS DISTRICT.

It is an offence to defecate or urinate in the drainage or open spaces within the Lagos Central Business District. Offenders will be prosecuted and upon conviction liable to a fine between N5, 000.00 & N 10,000.00.

4.    STRUCTURE ON ROAD SET BACK & ABUSE OF OPEN SPACE AND WALK PATH.

It is an offence to erect any structure on the road set back and walk path of any highway within the Lagos Central Business District and any open space within the district.

No person shall use any road set back or walk path or open space within the Lagos Central Business District for a mechanic workshop.
Offenders will be prosecuted and upon conviction liable to a fine between N5,000.00 & N10,000.00.

Persons convicted of any of these offences maybe ordered to render community service under the provisions of the Law.

Eko o ni baje o!

BIG thanks to Chinwe for putting this together.

Joke of the day. Let’s visit the court of law as this grannie is being tried for disobeying the laws of the state…

Grandma prolly knows you too!

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Is this wheel barrow worth 150k?

Lagos Island traffic fines (Min: 50,000 naira – Max: 150,000 naira – plus imprisonment) I tried so hard not to post this on All Fool’s Day, I guess the day’s almost over now, but post I must, and I have. Here’s Part I. Part 2 should be out tomorrow, and on Friday, Part 3. I’m too lazy to type, sorry, I have to seek the help of friends. They aren’t really “new” anyway, I guess the publication was only to sanitize the public who find themselves in Lagos Island, but of course, as you and I know, someone must “chop” and someone must “drop suntin”. Take am!

PUBLIC ATTENTION: LAGOS LAW AND ORDER

In the initiative to re-enforce Law and Order around the Lagos Central Business District, the Lagos State Government hereby draws the attention of the general public to the following PUBLIC DISORDER OFFENCES, contained in the CONTROL OF TRAFFIC (SPECIAL PROVISIONS) EDICT 1978 which by virtue of Section 315 of the 1999 constitution is now a Law of the Lagos State House of Assembly and the ROAD TRAFFIC LAW 2003 LAWS OF LAGOS STATE and the sanctions that maybe imposed upon conviction:

1 PROHIBITION OF PARKING ALONG LAGOS CENTRAL BUSINESS DISTRICT

No vehicle is allowed to park or pick passengers along the following highways within the Lagos Central Business District:

1 Outer and Inner Marina

2 Broad Street

3 Balogun Street

4 Martins Street

5 Nnamdi Azikiwe Street

6 Eko Bridge

7 Carter Bridge

8 Apongbon Street

9 Idumagbo Avenue

10 Campbell Street

11 Breadfruit Street

12 Tinubu Street

13 Abibu Oki Street

14 Oke Olowogbowo Street

15 Davis Street

16 Adeniji Adele Street

17 Church Street

18 Docemo Street

19 Odunlami Street

20 Iga Idunganran Street

21 Ereko Street

22 Kakawa Street

23 Campos Street

24 Bamgbose Street

25 Alli Balogun Street

26 Ehingbeti (Marina Foreshore)

27 Ebute Ero

28 Force Road

29 King George Road

30 All Flyovers in Lagos Island

www.LagosMet.Com

Any Person who fails to comply with the provisions of this Law would have his vehicle impounded by the authorized persons and shall be liable upon conviction to a fine and or term of imprisonment.

2 Abandoned vehicles

If you are the owner of a vehicle left on the highway within the Lagos central Business District for an unreasonable long period of time, you are to pay the following as cost of towing

Type of Vehicle                               Amount Payable

1 Articulated vehicles                  N 150,000.00

2 Empty trailers and Tanker          N 100,000.00

3 Lorries and Tippers                   N 50,000.00

4 High Capacity Buses                 N 50,000.00

5 Mini Buses, Jeeps and Cars        N 50,000.00

In addition, for abandoning the vehicle, the owner will be liable to fine of N 50,000.00 or (70,000.00 for commercial vehicle) or 3months imprisonment.

Persons convicted of any of the offences maybe ordered to render community service under the provisions of the Law.

Joke (reality) of the day: This toon right here (got this off facebook)

The world's worst job?

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Awolowo - Falomo Bridge

Lagos has been at a standstill all day and heavy traffic starting from Bonny camp has spread to Ojodu Berger and beyond. People spent an average of 4:30 hours from the mainland to the Island. If you have any plan to visit Victoria Island today, the best thing to do is to cancel it. I feel sorry for people who are stuck in that traffic with Manual gears and without A/C or with 10 litres of fuel. Believe me, you don’t want to be caught in that traffic by sunset when armed robbers and mobile phone agents are likely to take undue advantage of the unfortunate incidence.

Why the gridlock? A dead container trailer blocked the road to Bonny camp completely, such that even Okadas cannot squeeze into the tiny space leaving the whole of Lagos no other choice than to go through Falomo bridge, the second of three land ways to get into V.I. (The third option is the Ikorodu-Epe expressway). As a result, traffic from the third mainland bridge and Western Avenue all explore means to get to Falomo bridge either through Awolowo Road or Osbourne/Kingsway.

Zoom in on Awolowo Road

I don’t even want to think about the amount of man-hours or fuel burnt in traffic, I just know the State Government will come up with a law limiting trailers henceforth. For the sake of one man, Lagos suffered terribly on a Friday. Thank God it’s Friday!

Going home? Well, I’ll let you know how it is, that’s if people have not explored the unlawful one-way option, thereby blocking all incoming routes. As for me, I’m not leaving the Island until 9:45pm, or better still 11:00pm. Don’t wait for me though, cos I can as well crash somewhere on the Island… or in the car.

Enjoy your weekend.

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Just before you dip your hands into your pocket to pay “that man”, think about it, is it worth it?

You better put your thing down flip it and reverse it…

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