Long queues resurface at filling stations

Fuel (Petrol) scarcity hits Lagos hard:

UPDATE: Strike was called off on Tuesday, the 21st of April, 2009.

I feel like brushing whoever is responsible for this self-induced scarcity at this time when things are tight. The impact of the scarcity (long queues and more hold ups wherever there is a filling station) was first felt on Friday morning and it lasted throughout the evening even until 12:00am. Many gas stations refused to sell while multitudes queued with cars, bikes and jerry cans (kegs) hoping God would touch the hearts of the Oil Masters. More than half of Lagos depends on petrol-fueled generators and no one wants to spend the weekend in darkness, after having worked 4:00am to 9:00pm on weekdays. I came back from the office on Friday with my tank at R and red meaning no weekend trip for me until a miracle comes through. Yesterday, Saturday ws equally bad, but this morning, things seem to be a bit much better around Ilupeju but from radio reports, some areas have not smelled petrol since Thursday. It rained and drizzled a lot yesterday, but today, the sky looks great and you won’t be drenched queuing and fighting to fill your tanks. If someone “bashes” you, sorry, there’s nothing you can do about it, cos it happened in a “scuffle” – please take note!

I have a feeling churches will be emptier than last Sundays as people hold on to their hopeful slots at heavy, unfriendly, violent and uncompromising queues. Trust touts and black market guys, a litre is now 250 naira – that’s if you are lucky. If you can’t buy, simply join the queue and waste your whole day. I’m buying 60 litres and there aint no way in hell that I could ever be tempted to pay 15,000 naira. Lai lai, no be me. I’m a Lagosian.

You don't wanna be here, I bet.

Just in case you didn’t know, the scarcity will definitely affect schedules, i mean visiting, shopping, worship, and even tripping. But on a serious note, I did not see a single BRT bus held up, instead they were going their normal business, bullish as ever on their dedicated lanes. They aren’t affected so… I’m digging out my coins, piling them up for a possible trip to work thanks to Lagos BRT, and it’s so cold I don’t have to pay double to board the LAGBUS with Air Conditioner, i’ll join the old old shock absorber-less Tata Buses. Lasgidi babe!

===============================================

It was discovered that the fuel scarcity was due in part to two factors. LASTMA officials impounded about 50 fuel tankers for parking on the Apapa Wharf Road, a dirty operation which ended in vandalism, and demanded the payment of 150,000 naira per tanker. Also, NUPENG and the PPPRA demanded at least 50 billion naira to be paid into their account (an amount being owed them by the government for fuel subsidy) and payment was made by electronic means on Monday, the 20th of April, 2009. The Lagos State Government cleared their part on Tuesday and the issue was resolved.

Bookmark It

LagosMet Rainy Season: My do’s and don’ts for motorists and passengers.

I sincerely hope this is the final year Lagos would have to go without drainage. I don’t mean drainage in Ikeja or Lagos Island alone, I mean all over the state cos we all pay tax and this flood thingy is making the whole of Lagos look like

A lawyer's view of flooded Orile

Governor Raji Fashola (Pol Party: Action Congress AC) has done nothing. The Governor has tried his best, we know the power issue is beyond him but he can do much better in terms of security and drainage.

(Kindly include the link to this page if you intend to copy and paste the contents of this page. Please quote the source: http://lagosmet.com/blog/2009/04/lagosmet-rainy-season-my-dos-and-donts-for-motorists-and-passengers/)

I’d been yelling drainage since September last year when I stopped using my very low car, discarded it and got a higher one, a low-class 4 – wheeler (my papa no be politician). Now I can sing “because he lives… I can FACE tomorrow”. Tomorrow as in Lagos floods, nothing more to it. If I can swap minds with fellow readers, those with low cars, e.g. Old Accord, Mini, Bug, Picanto, QQ, I10, Celica, Legend and Previa, e.t.c. are already cursing their luck. Sorry, so goes the saying “save for the rainy day”. Now it’s raining, look outside your window, you see it drizzling, yeah, out there, it doesn’t reflect anything drizzling at all, it in fact paints the picture of the aftermath of a Tsunami. I’ve been avoiding blogging for some days now cos it takes me at least 4 hours to come up with something and I have a whole lot on my neck, I’m not so into coffee and this cold brings with it the lure of sleep… (you all are happy today’s a public holiday aint ya?). For this reason, I’ll keep facts, pictures and sturvs for some other time and go straight to the point. As usual, just my 2 cents, you don’t have to agree with me 100% but to those who have ears…

It’s Rainy Season, what do you do?

Your Umbrella or your life?

1. Buy an umbrella for the car, office, a friend and home.

2. If you haven’t raised your sport car, call your mechanic now

3. Don’t drive while it’s raining or less than 20 minutes after, it takes a while for highway floods to clear.

4. Don’t venture into roads you less frequently used (during the dry season) as floods make it difficult to differentiate pot holes from “gutters” and “canals”.

5. If you must drive while it’s drizzling or raining, turn your headlamps on and your emergency lamps too. Also, avoid depending on horns alone, while you honk, flass your full lights as well since most windows are wound up and A/Cs on in other to clear the windscreen of most cars. Some even tune up their radios for situation reports, coupled with the deafening sound of the rain and thunder outside, your horn alone is less than likely to pass the message across. Use your hazard lights and flash your full lights.

6. Avoid unnecessary overtaking. Everyone’s trying to avoid water clogged areas and also splashing water on pedestrians.

7. Trust your instincts, if it looks like your car won’t make it, then don’t take it. I mean don’t risk it, it’s never too late to turn back when your rear is clear. Once other cars join you there, you have little option than to be compelled to MOVE into the danger zone, and glory be to God if you (your car) survive. http://lagosmet.com/blog/2009/04/lagosmet-rainy-season-my-dos-and-donts-for-motorists-and-passengers/

8. Avoid reversing unnecessarily, it is against the law to face oncoming traffic (one-way) but in this period, you just can’t help it. Better to face oncoming traffic than to do a reverse. It is very dangerous, especially due to poor visibility. Poor visibility contributes 85% to most road accidents when it’s raining as some people don’t even have wipers, some don’t have A/Cs to clear the fog on the windscreen, some are hydrophobic and they just ram into you, then you try to step out and realise you are in the middle of the River Niger, you need the back of a tout to make it to the other side where you would only be drowned halfway.

9. If you can, avoid service lanes and generally the lower ends of unlevelled roads as they hold more water. Service Lanes hold deadly pot holes (especially along Ikorodu road up to Ketu). If you are not driving an LR4, and you can do without service lanes, please do. Palmgrove, Onipanu, Ojota, Ajah and some places in Victoria Island are Bermudas Triangles you don’t want to find yourself in.

He that is "drowned" needs fear no "flood"

10. Follow the leader, and give him some distance. Taxis (yellow and black) know the bad places in Lagos, they know the roads like you know the buttons of your mobile phone. Follow someone who has a flood navigator (don’t follow okadas or LR4’s, follow car for car or SUV for SUV, not Trailer for Cooper).

11. Have some airtime on your phone.

12. Service your car, fix your horn, tyres, winders, heaters, A/C, fog lamps, trafficators, and everything fixable. Believe you me, no one will stop for you when it’s pouring heavily. When it’s pouring, you don’t see the police and that’s when men of the underworld rush out en-masse, you make their work easier for them when your car breaks down for any reason, even a flat tyre.

13. Don’t drive alone but avoid picking unknown persons up. When it rains, it is assumed that all cars have tinted glasses and no one can see someone pointing weapons at you right in your car, and even if they do, they look for an exit and drive off, leaving you to your fate. Be very careful. Lock your doors.

14. Drive slowly, you have no choice. Tyre skid, brakes fail and cars stop suddenly when it pours, so be prepared to gently apply (not slam) your brakes. Traffic is bound to be heavier than on normal days so leave home some 30 minutes earlier than usual, but not too early. In fact don’t leave home while it’s dark as floods will force you to drive slowly or even stop and that’s when “our friends” can make a run at you. You will also notice that colleagues get to work/meetings later than they used to.

15. Ensure you have a fair amount of gas (sorry, petrol) in your tank. Rain-induced traffic are 69% heavier.

http://lagosmet.com/blog/2009/04/lagosmet-rainy-season-my-dos-and-donts-for-motorists-and-passengers/

As for Pedestrians, you know the rules already.

BIS under siege sometime ago

1. Umbrella

2. Nylon cover, shower caps, or raincoat, umbrellas can’t withstand strong winds.

3. Rain boots (keep a spare pair of shoes in the office and trouser/skirt too). Rubber shoes are on sale now (Max: 400 naira.). Sometimes NEPA/PHCN poles bow to the winds and live power cables/wires find their way into the stagnant waters creating death traps for innocent pedestrians. I’d say rubber boots are essentials.

4. Use the BRT (thank God LAGBUS have resumed operation), if you feel that friend’s rickety car might nor make it, or that your car is not in the best rain condition

5. Have airtime on your line, call your superior if traffic is hell.

6. Avoid carrying laptops and other bulky electronics that won’t fit in beneath the raincoat.

7. Keep yourself warm

8. Carry a 50cl bottle of water, to wash your feet when you reach your destination.

9. Don’t forget to pick your umbrella after leaving it out to dry…

10. Don’t walk in the path of motorists, especially in the clear paths as motorists desperately try to avoid water and have poorer visibility seeing through water clogged screens. You are more likely to get hit by a hit and run driver in this period. http://lagosmet.com/blog/2009/04/lagosmet-rainy-season-my-dos-and-donts-for-motorists-and-passengers/

11. Do not back traffic; face on coming traffic and always be prepared to dive. Don’t cuss the driver or the governor when it does happen.

12. Relocate if you can, closer to the office or your business. As bus fares skyrocket (even BRT and LAGBUS increased fares), you will find it cheaper to stay closer to your source of income.

13. Take your leave. We usually have one or two 3-day non stop rain and 7-day non stop drizzling, I can’t think of a better time to take your leave than then. I just hate traffic.

14. Not a good time to pay friends a visit. In fact, Churches will see a decrease in the congregation size too. Do not promise to visit friends at this point in time, and don’t pay surprise visits as your hosts may be 3 hours away in traffic or trying to pull their car our of the canal.

15. Be careful where you put your legs into. Some stagnant waters house various pests and diseases, and some “small” waters can mask deep gutters and sharp objects. Do not be tempted to take off your shoes unless you know the road so well. It is always safer to turn back.

16. Finally, if you can’t “enter” the rain, then wait in a safe place, there is no shame in doing so, but it is sometimes dangerous. Watch where, who and for how long you do. My advice, don’t stay behind for too long, move as soon as the rain subsides.

Eh, 2 hours gone already! I got work to do guys, you can help with the ones I missed out on. I wish you all the best. You can send me pictures and stories of floods in your area and I will do well to post them here, of course with your name on it, if you don’t mind.

Safety first, no regrets. Happy Easter.

All rights reserved, Christino Xsi Penthome, 2009.

If you enjoyed reading this, please refer this page to a friend.

Link to this page: http://lagosmet.com/blog/2009/04/lagosmet-rainy-season-my-dos-and-donts-for-motorists-and-passengers/

Bookmark It

Is this wheel barrow worth 150k?

Lagos Island traffic fines (Min: 50,000 naira – Max: 150,000 naira – plus imprisonment) I tried so hard not to post this on All Fool’s Day, I guess the day’s almost over now, but post I must, and I have. Here’s Part I. Part 2 should be out tomorrow, and on Friday, Part 3. I’m too lazy to type, sorry, I have to seek the help of friends. They aren’t really “new” anyway, I guess the publication was only to sanitize the public who find themselves in Lagos Island, but of course, as you and I know, someone must “chop” and someone must “drop suntin”. Take am!

PUBLIC ATTENTION: LAGOS LAW AND ORDER

In the initiative to re-enforce Law and Order around the Lagos Central Business District, the Lagos State Government hereby draws the attention of the general public to the following PUBLIC DISORDER OFFENCES, contained in the CONTROL OF TRAFFIC (SPECIAL PROVISIONS) EDICT 1978 which by virtue of Section 315 of the 1999 constitution is now a Law of the Lagos State House of Assembly and the ROAD TRAFFIC LAW 2003 LAWS OF LAGOS STATE and the sanctions that maybe imposed upon conviction:

1 PROHIBITION OF PARKING ALONG LAGOS CENTRAL BUSINESS DISTRICT

No vehicle is allowed to park or pick passengers along the following highways within the Lagos Central Business District:

1 Outer and Inner Marina

2 Broad Street

3 Balogun Street

4 Martins Street

5 Nnamdi Azikiwe Street

6 Eko Bridge

7 Carter Bridge

8 Apongbon Street

9 Idumagbo Avenue

10 Campbell Street

11 Breadfruit Street

12 Tinubu Street

13 Abibu Oki Street

14 Oke Olowogbowo Street

15 Davis Street

16 Adeniji Adele Street

17 Church Street

18 Docemo Street

19 Odunlami Street

20 Iga Idunganran Street

21 Ereko Street

22 Kakawa Street

23 Campos Street

24 Bamgbose Street

25 Alli Balogun Street

26 Ehingbeti (Marina Foreshore)

27 Ebute Ero

28 Force Road

29 King George Road

30 All Flyovers in Lagos Island

www.LagosMet.Com

Any Person who fails to comply with the provisions of this Law would have his vehicle impounded by the authorized persons and shall be liable upon conviction to a fine and or term of imprisonment.

2 Abandoned vehicles

If you are the owner of a vehicle left on the highway within the Lagos central Business District for an unreasonable long period of time, you are to pay the following as cost of towing

Type of Vehicle                               Amount Payable

1 Articulated vehicles                  N 150,000.00

2 Empty trailers and Tanker          N 100,000.00

3 Lorries and Tippers                   N 50,000.00

4 High Capacity Buses                 N 50,000.00

5 Mini Buses, Jeeps and Cars        N 50,000.00

In addition, for abandoning the vehicle, the owner will be liable to fine of N 50,000.00 or (70,000.00 for commercial vehicle) or 3months imprisonment.

Persons convicted of any of the offences maybe ordered to render community service under the provisions of the Law.

Joke (reality) of the day: This toon right here (got this off facebook)

The world's worst job?

Bookmark It

Just before you dip your hands into your pocket to pay “that man”, think about it, is it worth it?

You better put your thing down flip it and reverse it…

Bookmark It

I have quite a lot in my head but really no time to pour them all down. Okay since tomorrow is a typical (hopefully won’t be a hectic) Monday, i’ll leave you with one of my favorite (poorly written yet well understood) Lagos journal of a company driver on a Monday.

Monday Diary of an Expired Company Driver (from Rubminds.com)

Typical Lagos setting, Oshodi to be precise

My best friend, Seiko is a bastard bad boy. He disturbs my sleep with his passion to feel the morning breeze. It’s 4:30 am and the world’s most invaluable machine wakes me up, the monster cereal devouring cockerels must be saving their crows up for December, you know, so it doesn’t count whether or not they crow now, in fact, they should save that in their thighs. I climb up to switch the idiot off and I always have to do that on weekdays because if I keep my friend within the reach of an arm’s stretch I will not only lose my job, my Landlord no go gree me rest.

I dash into the pit latrine/bathroom combo, throw the bucket of semi clean water up and dash out while the helpless water splashes behind me, and in the process, displacing some spyrogyra and blocking the green hole further, who cares. I slip into my overall, and push Ronke to the other side of the bed, she falls on the rug in the process. With her red eyes wide shut amidst pythonic hisses, i pick my naturally pressure ironed blue shirt and navy blue trouser and dump both of them in the big brown super garri sack. The rubber shoes need no Kiwi, it’s my bathroom shoe anyway. I take a shot form my magic bottle, wish myself goodluck and put God first (I already did na?). I leave 30 naira under the lantern, that’s a pack of 4 (must I tell you everything?).

I hit the streets, whistling silently yet praying to God, Allah, Buddha, Sango, Obatala, Ogun and any saviour that came to mind. Streets is millitary nowadays. I’m clutching hard on Nigeria’s longest serving 3310, the keypad is somewhere in the kitchen, thanks to the broom stick stylus. Nothing looks better than the original casing, no screen, just large cellotapes and the battery won’t fall off today, I got more rubber bands. Jokes apart I still have flashing credit, some big phones out there have no SIM some even have blocked SIMs, I have a good cause to be grateful to my creator.

I hear the sound of a bike and tap my boots, ready to take off. Which kin bike go waka around 5:00 a.m.? Sound kicks off and it’s my favorite Pasuma track, I immediately know it’s Sura, my inconsistent saviour. “Omo ele yen nko? (how’s that chic)” he asks as we speed off the streets, navigating through giant wells called pot holes. “You suppose marry that girl o, omo yen respect wa ju onidirabata yen lo” as he drops me at the bus stop. I wave at him as he speeds on the opposite way, the one-way traffic. Lagosians! I’m sure my kwara people learnt this animalistic lifestyle from here.

It’s 10 past 5 a.m and the garage is like there’s been no break since the opening ceremony. The stalls were empty but commuters everywhere again. Ha Kilode! “Fuel no dey”, i knew trouble was bound to happen this morning and I shouldn’t have left that 30 naira. “Oshodi, 150, ko si iya were, ma wole o”… (various warnings and threats but we all rush into the bus). This route has been set at 100 after the last strike and has been so ever since but to my surprise, everyone pays 150 naira. These office people sef, I stretch my 100 card to him. “Awa Share man (chairman) ni”, he grinned as he took the money from me. “Shiaman we no suppose collect money but na fuel cause am”. I gave a proud nod, no one cared to listen, some slept off some showed their “stolen” phones off, some put their earphones in their ears while I was left alone to look at myself, pondering do I actually looked like an “Agbero” or are these drivers JJC’s in the area?

I “drop” at Airport bus stop, cross to the other side (the pedestrian bridge would be more of a suicide than facing fast cars either way doing 140!). Shaibu, the funky mallam hands the keys to the Toyota Coaster to me as fast as he could while I speed off, picking average salary earners on the way. Arrogant lagosians, few bother to say good morning, I don’t blame them, rich people are never happy (sorry, hardly ever…) that way I knew the ones who greeted me where the lucky ones whom by stroke of chance passed the interviews yet would not let their newly found fountain of cash change their social life. Nkem was one of them. Nkemic I hailed her briefly. The stingy ones who refused to use their cars because the company had a lorry where the ones who accused me of showing up late, dem forget say condition na im make crayfish bend. It was quarter to 6 a.m now and I already knew the suicide routes.

If Maryland is free then I should hit Jibowu and dash on to the third mainland bridge to link up with Osbourne road. Cutting through Anthony to Oworo wouldn’t be wise now, and Apongbon, the road’s still under repairs, I slam the lorry through Ikorodu road and make a sharp U -turn after Jibowu, I would not climb Yaba bridge except on Thursdays when traders wouldn’t be in till 10a.m. due to sanitation.

As predicted, I join the bottleneck just before Adeniji, endure till I hit the Osbourne bridge, the breakthrough did not last for long, but I was prepared for that. I slice through the exit by the right and cut out to the left just before the turning that led to NNPC. I go on straight into the road and turn right again, “wa sere”, this should be the last lap, Falomo bridge and we are home, sweet home. The right side moves the fastest so I make a rough cut just before the bridge past the Assumption Church to the “round about” to join the “wise” ones who went through Awolowo way at this time of the morning. 6:25am already. Everyday was not going to be Christmas anyway. As I watch my colleagues on this side of the bridge move slowly towards the Island, I felt like running into this 1915 Camry which had broken down halfway into the bridge and right beside it, the annoyingly ever-overheating Benz Model, the baby benz 190E was overheating.

Trust my people, the same people who were saluting while I went through those shortcuts in order to ensure they resumed work early were the same set of people screaming “we want his head!”. Eventually, the Camry picks up but of course 5 minutes on Falomo bridge is equivalent to 15 minutes at the Law School. So the evil morning went brothers and sisters, the most beautiful yet old traffic warden stops my truck when I was hoping to be the last to pass. I hiss loudly she could have heard even through the A/C tight chicken factory I was driving, and when she finally allows me to go, I look at my rear view and the same Camry couldn’t move, I pity the guys behind him, I saw it coming so I forcefully overtook him at the bend before the halt.

The rest of the journey wasn’t really smooth but provided nothing to talk about save for the usual scenario of bankers looking up to Iya Basira to “do as usual” and fill the hungry plates up, then they return to the office, blasting English like they ate at TFC or Tantalizers. I know say una don chop, make me sef run go mama put go feed the worms for my belle. Forgive my Spanish pigeon English.

Have a nice day at work and remember, if you are negligent at work today, someone’s at the interview waiting to take it.

Osenobua! Na red eye we dey o.

Bookmark It