Please send to your female friends (married & single). If you are unmarried, store this as info to use when you do get married. For the married please share with your spouse. It’s an act with all pains but no gain.

Shop Lock

MANY sisters have boasted in my presence of how often they have had to ‘lock shop’ early, or how they lock shop for weeks, sometimes months, in order to teach hubby a lesson or just to spite him. These sisters are of the impression that they can do as they please, because they have the shop keys. As a result, they lock shop for every little thing, without giving consideration to the ’shopper’.

There are exceptions to every rule, and opinions will sometimes differ.
However, where shop-locking is concerned, my philosophy is that shop should remain open at all times. I agree that teeth and tongue will meet, but shop-locking should never be used as a weapon or tool in conflict resolution. Couples should find suitable ways to solve problems.

It is a fact that not all ’shops’ have a common closing time. As a matter of fact when one shop door closes, another is usually right around the corner with a big neon sign that blinks ‘OPEN FOR BUSINESS’. Be wary of shops that are open late! The goods they stock are usually illegal, contaminated or expired. Ladies, if you or hubby should get sick or go to an early grave, let it not be due to consumption of tainted goods from another woman’s shop.

Shop-locking adds fuel to fire in most cases. Women should never be fooled into believing that by putting up a ‘CLOSED’ sign on the shop door they are on their way to problem solving. Women, a hungry man will not allow himself to starve to death. Some will stop at nothing in their quest to satisfy their seemingly insatiable hunger. They will accept anything, whether hot and spicy or cold and icy. Some men will eat food not for taste, but for mere survival. They eat to live, to satisfy a need. That, my friends, is the nature of man.

When shop locks, who suffers more? In reality isn’t it the shopkeeper more than the shopper? Sisters, please, I implore you, learn from the immigrants who come and set up shop on our soil, and keep shop open. Stop closing shop for every little thing. Open shop in shop seasons. Open shop on holidays. Open shop late at nights. Open shop during storm and hurricane. Open shop when shop should be open.

Even the well-bred man who eats out and scrupulously cleans his hands and mouth will bring home even a morsel from his street meal. Visualise what could happen when shop reopens for business as usual and some of his contaminated crumbs fall onto your plate. Imagine that you would have contributed to this scenario by locking shop. A word to the wise is sufficient

Jacqueline Champier , the author has an MSc in counselling and psychology and writes from Mandeville Jamaica

www.LagosMet.com

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If you can, please bite!

LagosMet Tips: How to avoid, manage or repel a rapist, rape. RAPE, a topic no one wants share, remember, or report.

With no 911, rehab or respect, the present scare and scourge of HIV/AIDS, talkless of pregnancy, the last thing you want to come face to face with is the certainty of rape, or a rapists hands down your zippers. Thanks to Gov. Fashola, Oshodi is now a beauty to behold, even at night. Gone are the days when people who try to beat the early morning traffic on their way to work end up being raped in Oshodi even along the rail road. Things have changed now though. Stampedes, riots and curfews are sure fire ways to risk being raped and rapists are everywhere, in hostels, schools, parties, camps e.t.c. and they usually get away with it because no one dares to report.

Here in Lagos, there have been reports of fathers raping daughters (repeatedly), uncles deflowering nieces (forcefully), secondary teachers having their way with students and even gay rapes in male hostels. The after-effect of rape could be life-threatening sadness, darkness, depression and inability to trust. Some rape victims eventually commit suicide, some become very religious, while some refuse to settle down. Trust me, it’s recession, everyone’s cutting cost or getting laid off (not getting laid!) and you don’t want to add one rapist’s son to your payroll – rape is of no moral, spiritual, physical, social or even economic value. Its a stigma no one wants to live with. Have you been raped? You certainly don’t want a repeat. I feel for you, I don’t know how it feels but you must share your experiences sometime (on SecretZen, or Rubminds), with others, maybe, anonymously, and empty your mind just so you can move on.

The son of a rapist is what?

As the rains approach, the weather becomes cold, there isn’t a better time than now to be wary of rapists. Please read and pass on:

Source: http://rubminds.com/forums/general-discussion/through-a-rapist’s-eyes-(no-joke)/

_{Long read but  worth it.. Pass it on to every female you know; you can even share this link.}

A  group of rapists and date rapists in prison were  interviewed on what they look for in a potential  victim and here are some interesting  facts:

1) The  first thing men look for in a potential victim  is hairstyle. They  are most likely to go after a woman  with a  ponytail, bun, braid or other hairstyle that can  easily be grabbed .  They are also likely to go  after a  woman with long hair .  Women with short hair are not common  targets.

2) The  second thing men look for  is clothing.  They will look for women  who’s clothing is easy to remove  quickly.  Many of them carry scissors around specifically to  cut clothing.

3) They  also look  for women on their cell phone, searching  through their purse, or doing  other activities while  walking because  they are off-guard and can be easily  overpowered.

4) Men  are most likely to attack & rape in the early  morning, between 5:  00a.m. and 8:30a.m.

5) The  number one place women are abducted from/attacked  is grocery  store parking lots.  The number two: office  parking lots/garages. Number  three: public  restrooms.

6)  The thing about these men is that they  are looking  to grab a woman and quickly move her to another  location where  they don’t have to worry about getting  caught.

7) Only 2% said they carried weapons  because rape carries a 3-5 year sentence but rape  with a weapon is 15-20 years.

If  you put  up any kind of a fight at  all, they  get discouraged because  it only takes a minute or two for them to realize  that going after you isn’t worth it because it will  be time-consuming.

9) These men said they  would not  pick on women who have  umbrellas,  or other similar objects  that can  be used from a  distance, in  their hands.

Keys  are NOT a  deterrent because  you have to get really close to the attacker to use  them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these  guys you’re not worth it.

10) Several defense  mechanisms he taught us are: If  someone is following behind  you on  a street or in a garage or with you in a n elevator  or stairwell, look  them in the face and ask them a  question,  like what  time is it?,  or make general small talk: ‘I can’t believe it is so  cold out here,’ ‘We’re in for a bad  winter.’ Now  you’ve seen their face and could identify them in a  line-up; you lose appeal as a  target.

http://lagosmet.com/blog/2009/04/how-to-avoid-manage-repel-rapist-rape-tips/

11) If  someone is coming toward you, hold  out your hands in front of you and yell STOP! or  STAY BACK!Most of the rapists this man talked to  said they’d  leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she  would not be afraid to fight  back.  Again, they are looking for an EASY  target.

12) If you carry  pepper spray (this  instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it  with him wherever he goes), yell I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY  and holding  it out will be a  deterrent.

13) If  someone grabs you,  you can’t beat them with strength but you can  by outsmarting  them.  If you are grabbed around the waist from  behind, pinch  the attacker either under  the Arm (between  the elbow and armpit) OR  in the upper inner thigh VERY  VERY HARD.  One woman in a class this guy taught told him she  used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to  date rape her and was so upset she broke through the  skin and tore out muscle strands – the guy needed  stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as  hard as you can stand it – it  hurts.

14) After  the initial hit, always GO  for the GROIN.  I know from a particularly unfortunate experience  that if you slap a guy’s parts it  is extremely painful.  You might think that you’ll anger the guy and make  him want to hurt you more, but the thing these  rapists told our instructor is that they want a  woman who will not cause a lot of  trouble. Start  causing trouble and he’s out of  there.

15) When  the guy puts his hands up to  you, grab  his first two fingers and bend them back as far as  possible with as much pressure pushing down on them  as possible. The instructor did it to me without  using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and  both knuckles cracked audibly.

16) Of course  the things we always hear still  apply. Always  be aware of your surroundings, take  someone with you if you can and if  you see any odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, go with  your instincts!!!

You  may feel a little silly at the time, but you’d feel  much worse if the guy really was  trouble.

1.  Tip from Tae  Kwon Do :  The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If  you are close enough to use it, do!

2.  Learned this from a tourist guide  in New  Orleans :  If a robber asks for your wallet and/or  purse,DO  NOT HAND IT TO HIM.  Toss it away from you….chances are that he is more  interested in your wallet and/or purse than you, and  he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN  LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER  DIRECTION!

3.  If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car, kick  out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the  hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won’t  see you, but everybody else will. This has saved  lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into  their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc.,  and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a  list, etc.) DON’T  DO THIS! The  predator will be watching you, and this is the  perfect opportunity for him to get in on the  passenger side, put a gun to your head, and tell you  where to go. AS  SOON AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR, LOCK THE DOORS AND  LEAVE.

a. If someone is in the car with a gun  to your head DO  NOT DRIVE OFF,  repeat: DO  NOT DRIVE OFF!  Instead gun the engine and speed into anything,  wrecking the car. Your Air Bag will save you. If the  person is in the back seat they will get the worst  of it. As soon as the car crashes bail out and run.  It is better than having them find your body in a  remote location.

5  A few notes about getting into your car in a parking  lot or parking garage:

A.) Be aware: look  around you, look into your car, at the passenger  side floor, and in the back seat.

B.) If you  are parked next to a big van, enter your car from  the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their  victims by pulling them into their vans while the  women are attempting to get into their  cars.

C.) Look at the car parked on the  driver’s side of your vehicle, and the passenger  side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest  your car, you may want to walk back into the mall,  or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back  out.

IT  IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY . (And better  paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take  the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are  horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime  spot. This is especially true at NIGHT!)

7.  If the predator has a gun and you are not under his  control, ALWAYS  RUN! The  predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in  100 times. And even then, it most  likely WILL  NOT be  a vital organ.RUN,  preferably in a zigzag  pattern!

8. As  women, we are always trying to be  sympathetic: STOP! It  may get you raped or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial  killer, was a good-looking, well-educated man, who  ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting  women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often  asked ‘for help’ into his vehicle or with his  vehicle, which is when he abducted his next  victim.
9.  Another Safety Point: Someone just told me that her  friend heard a crying baby on her porch the night  before last, and she called the police because it  was late and she thought it was weird. The police  told her ‘Whatever  you do, DO NOT open the  door.’

The  lady then said that it sounded like the baby had  crawled near a window, and she was worried that it  would crawl to the street and get run over. The  policeman said, ‘We already have a unit on the way,  whatever you do, DO  NOT open the door.’ He  told her that they think a serial killer has a  baby’s cry recorded and uses it to coax women out of  their homes thinking that someone dropped off a  baby. He said they have not verified it, but have  had several calls by women saying that they hear  baby’s cries outside their doors when they’re home  alone at night.

Please  pass this on and DO NOT open the door for a crying  baby — This should be taken seriously because the  Crying Baby theory was mentioned  on America’s  Most Wanted this  past Saturday when they profiled the serial killer  in Louisiana .

I’d  like you to forward this to all the women you know.  It may save a life. A candle is not dimmed by  lighting another candle. I was going to send this to  the ladies only, but guys, if you love your mothers,  wives, sisters, daughters, etc., you may want to  pass it onto them, as well.

Source: http://rubminds.com/forums/general-discussion/through-a-rapist’s-eyes-(no-joke)/

Take away: Bobby Bishops song for Amy (a teenage rape victim)

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Governor Fashola

In Simon’s article, Understanding the Fashola Phenomenon, the relationship between Fashola and Tinubu clearly explains why Lagos is moving forward. He also compared the governor with other peers who have embarked on white elephant projects and like their predecessors have failed to make an impact. Please read on…

“Anytime someone pours encomium on Lagos State Governor Babatunde Fashola, I smile, mischievously. I’m usually amused because… Okay, I’ll come back to that shortly. A few days ago, I was, as usual, discussing Nigeria with a friend. He recently had a terrible experience with a government institution. “We can never get it right in this country,” he said in frustration. “Nigeria is doomed,” he proclaimed on top of his voice. I looked at him and said: “Fashola.” I could feel his anger melt down. Reluctantly, he replied: “You may have a point there.” What did I mean by “Fashola”? No, I was not saying Fashola was about to solve all our problems. But under two years, he has demonstrated a sense of urgency, commitment and focus. It is not just about the change he is bringing to Lagos, but also the promise he has shown. He is showing us clearly that we are not living in a hopeless society, that things can change and change for good. Fashola has renewed my hope that a new Nigeria is possible.
It is very easy to think Nigeria is doomed. I have agonised over this doom most of my adult life. It is very difficult to see hope. We hardly see the silver lining in a dark cloud; rather, we see a dark lining in a silver cloud, as someone said years ago. We are so frustrated and pessimistic that we don’t even see the opportunities and prospects that gawk at us. All we can see are problems and pains. You cannot blame the Nigerian. We appear to be helpless and hopeless. We are like a sheep without a shepherd. Therefore, whenever someone appreciates Fashola, I smile mischievously, as if saying: “Didn’t you say it is finished with Nigeria?” And believe it or not, there are a hundred Fasholas – educated, exposed, committed, focused and visionary – all over Nigeria who do not have the opportunity to shine because of our peculiar political structure.
The major difference, however, is that someone placed merit above political expediency and stuck out his neck for Fashola. I’m talking about Asiwaju Bola Ahmed Tinubu, the immediate past governor of Lagos State. Having ruled Lagos for eight turbulent years, during which he kept battling with the President Olusegun Obasanjo-led PDP troops who were hell-bent on capturing Lagos at any cost, Tinubu could easily have handed over to another politician. There were many of them around him, pressing him left, right and centre. He chose, instead, to throw his weight behind a certain Babatunde Raji Fashola who was unknown outside the Lagos corridors of power. Why did Tinubu settle for Fashola? Why did he choose to gamble on someone who had never been a councillor, much less a council chairman, in a society where we make jest of people like Pat Utomi because their political CV is not intimidating?
Tinubu opted for someone whose first exercise of executive power would be in the office of the governor of Lagos, the most chaotic and the most strategic state in Nigeria. Why? My guess is that Tinubu saw something in him which some of us did not see. My guess is that having laid out a beautiful plan for Lagos which he could not fully implement because of political expediency in the Obasanjo years, Tinubu was sincerely committed to getting a rightful successor who would carry out the assignment to a logical conclusion. He put merit above merriment, purpose above politics, reason above rhyme. I wish Obasanjo could honestly say the same regarding his own choice of successor.
Why is Fashola making progress? This should provide good PhD research topics for political scientists and maybe economists. Since I am a student of Governance and Development, I will look at the Lagos Model from my own bias. My write-up today should help us understand the Fashola Phenomenon and put things in proper perspective. We can then ask: what can the rest of Nigeria learn from this? The major obstacle to good governance in Nigeria, in my own opinion, is politics. You can replace that word with “politicking”. Many times, we have managed to produce good people in government but they end up as failures. Why? I suggest: the impediments caused by politicking. For you to succeed as a leader in Nigeria, you must get your politics and policy right. You may have good policies, but without the right politics you will fail. No matter how much we dislike politicians, we need them. You can never have politics without politicians. That is one. On the other hand, you may get all your politics right – pleasing some people, pummelling others, perfecting all the intrigues – but the society will never move forward if you do not have the right policies. You, therefore, cannot escape a happy marriage of politics and policy if you are to be an achiever.
Now here comes the Lagos Model. Fashola is the “technocrat” who handles governance, the finer details. Tinubu is the “godfather” who handles the politics, you know, the murky waters. They complement each other. Tinubu himself is a technocrat, to be sure, but the politician took the better part of him during his tenure as he had to fight off the PDP hawks. If Fashola begins to play politics today, governance will suffer. If he was interested in politicking, he could never have removed the traders from Oshodi. He could never have chased away those yellow buses from the highway. In Nigerian politics, the critical mass of voters will be found in markets and at motor parks. The real voters and foot soldiers are petty traders, bus drivers, conductors and touts. The conventional wisdom is that if you control the motor parks, you control the thugs; if you control the thugs, you control the polling booth; if you control the polling booth, you control the votes! That is why associations such as National Union of Road Transport Workers (NURTW) and Road Transport Employers Association of Nigeria (RTEAN) are very strategic to politicians and there is always a fierce battle to control them.
By taking these tough decisions, Fashola would have been committing political suicide. But, no, there is Tinubu to clean up the “mess” politically. This frees Fashola to retain his focus without much distraction. It is like in football: you have a defensive midfielder and an attacking midfielder – the former, like Tinubu, handles the defensive part of the job while the latter, like Fashola, is freed and creates goals for his team. Politics and policy, like we said, must be happily married if we are to enjoy good governance in this country. Fashola has never made any attempt to discredit his predecessor. I hear a lot of PDP people say: “It’s Tinubu’s programme that Fashola is implementing.” Pure rubbish. One of the biggest obstacles to our development is this mentality that you must discredit your predecessor and discontinue his programmes so that people would not say you don’t have your own ideas. Pure rubbish. Government is a continuum. If anything, policy reversals have done a lot of damage to the country, as we can see at the federal level.

Fashola and S.A.Ferguson

President Umaru Musa Yar’Adua came to office in May 2007, and – based on the advice of people who probably had selfish motives – he suspended the power projects, cancelled the Lagos-Kano rail contract and reversed the privatisation of refineries. Nearly two years after, Yar’Adua is going back to the same power and rail projects – and he now wants to privatise the refineries again. Precious time wasted for nothing! Does he know the billions of dollars and invaluable productivity we have lost as a result of this? Why must he reverse policies for the fun of it? All the talk about 6,000 megawatts today is based on the projects Obasanjo initiated in 2006! So why waste our time? This is very common all over Nigeria – new governors abandoning critical projects for selfish reasons. Fashola has proved to be wiser than most.
But can we replicate the Lagos Model all over Nigeria? For instance, would Dr. Chimaroke Nnamani have performed better as Enugu governor if he had faced governance and allowed Jim Nwobodo to handle the politics? That is the problem with modelling. What works in Sokoto may not work in Akwa Ibom and what works in Oyo may fail in Kogi. However, the fundamental truth cannot be altered – that “politics and policy” must be delicately balanced, happily married, if we are to make progress. Whether one person should handle the two or there should be “separation of powers” between the “politician” and the “technocrat” is what we can debate more extensively. However, the Lagos Model can work for Nigeria as witnessed under Obasanjo administration. Obasanjo, though a terrible politician who was obviously power drunk, managed to handle the politics while “technocrats” such as Prof. Chukwuma Soludo, Mrs Oby Ezekwesili, Dr. Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, Mr. Bode Agusto, Dr. Mansur Muhtar and Mallam Nasir el-Rufai went about the business of governance. Obasanjo’s battle with his own contradictions might have discredited his government, but we certainly made some progress under his government.
Can we then toy with the idea of a “politician” President and a “technocratic” VP in 2011? Technocrats have their failings, just like politicians too, so we need a balance. Somehow, I think Nigeria’s redemption will benefit tremendously by learning from the Lagos Model. It’s a phenomenon we should give serious consideration to, as we battle to create a new Nigeria.”

Joke of the day: African Remix Video (Beyonce put a ring on it) All the single ladies spoof

and Don’t put that ring on it (Spoof Video)

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Brothers and Sisters,

If you didn't know now you do.

LAGOS, NIGERIA: I don’t know how you’ll react to this message or revelation or reminder or piece of crap but one thing is sure; you will agree with me that these things do happen a lot around us so much that I can be forgiven to use the word “rampant”. Okay, when I blog, i leave so many things aside, i don’t mince words, for the sake of young readers I try to use dotted lines so you can, with your durrry mind, fill in the gap. Let’s leave religious hypocrisy and pretence aside and face the truth no one likes to talk about… cos you are probably one of them.

Relationships in Lagos, like in any Metropolis are usually dirty. I mean verbally dirty, morally dirty, spiritually dirty, socially dirty, financially dirty and maybe (sorry almost always) physically durrrry! Now where do I start from? Hmmmm…  Distance relationships! Common, you know what I mean, people need someone to hug and to hold, someone to hang out with, on thursday nights and weekends, in short someone to lust! Did you get that? Someone to lolox! Did I hear you say cheating? Come with me and see mums, dads, bosses, colleagues, siblings, friends and even partners getting help. Are you trying to cope with stress and depression from unemployment or the monster recession and just need to ease off? Okay I see you grabbing your cellphone, don’t dial 911 just yet, help’s on the way…

Okay let’s get down right serious. You ask someone, “Hey, what you doing with that person?”, you get the answer:

Her boyfriend’s in another Taraba State, I’m just helping her.

His wife’s 6 months pregnant, I’m helping him. No strings attached.

His wife’s out of town and my boyfriend’s in NYSC camp, we are helping each other.

Her boyfriend won’t be visiting till next week and we are next door neighbours, what’s bad in helping each other?

She’s away in another school and her boyfriend is on a course in the UK, I’m just trying to be of help to them.

You should know by now what the word “help” means – this has nothing to do with recharge cards or money. It’s plain, straight-to-the-point, no stories, durrry quickie sex – nothing to lose! If you haven’t heard the words Sharp Sharp, Kia Kia, Pa Pa Pa, One Time… now you know they mean “In a giffy”. It’s confusing when an individual tries to “help” so many people at the same time. It’s even more confusing when the needy ones know they are being helped by the same superman or superwoman. It’s part of the fun in Lagos innit?

The surprising thing is the abnormal understanding noticed in this type of relationship. It is firstly a relationship with no future or chance of getting anywhere, a higher version of the one night stand. If there is any exchange of any material nature, it’s simply mutual and not part of the plan as this is no sex-for-money thingy. You help in kind, not cash. Another thing is how people have evolved into loving one person and keeping such for marriage and at the same time helping a host of others who eventually show up to cheer their helpmates up at their wedding. For all I care, help goes on well after marriage even when both parties are married. A friend once told me his helpmate’s boyfriend called while they were helping each other but he was on another level and just couldn’t stop, even when she picked up the phone and the helpless one at the other end (who probably has his helpmate there too) could hear sounds of “torturing” over the phone… what a great way to retire to bed!

I’m not asking you to start suspecting your partner. Helpers are everywhere; schools, churches, neighbourhood, workplaces, dating/social networking sites (naijapals, facebook, legwork)… just name it. Age is no barrier when everyone is a potential helper, don’t be deceived by looks. I won’t go around asking you to “resist the devil and he will flee from you”, nope, I just believe if you are old enough to read through this blog, you can either say YES or NO to helping or being helped. And if you must help or be helped, please protect yourself so that your helpless partner can find you in one piece but know that you may not be able to “free” your erotic mind from your helpmate even when your partner returns. This could lead to a life of guilt, fear of blackmail, absent-mindedness, and depression if care is not taken. Risks as usual include breakup (busting), unwanted pregnancy, unwanted marriage, STDs, murder, rape (at the point of no return), ritual killing, robbery and so many ugly things. Nothing is entirely hidden you know. As you render helpful services, remember that someone could be helping your “love” elsewhere too. If your partner doesn’t trust you then someone is likely going to dial 911.

Do you still need help? Do you still want to help someone? Say it now, or forever hold your peace!

Joor Oh! Mi o le help Iya Arugbo O! (Please, I can’t “help” a grannie!)

Enjoy your weekend.

X.

A hunter with only one arrow does not shoot on impulse. – Naija Proverb

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… put your ring fingers up.

Call me Sasha Fierce

It’s kinda like a Lagos anthem now. If you’ve been going out with your guy for more than two years then I can bet you are probably consciously/unconsciously singing this song every minute. Not like Beyonce got a ring (the video didn’t reflect the lyrics) but the message is loud and clear.

“If you like it BETTER put a ring on it”

Can an average Lagosian put food the size of a ring in his mouth let alone a metal in a babe’s finger? Okay do babes mind, we have plastic/rubber rings too. LoL. Obviously she’s talking marriage really, not engagement and not just a ring. If I understand the last part, she says get serious with me, quit playing around and be responsible. I’m not a Beyonce fan but I do not like the way people go about saying the song is crap.

“Pull me into your arms
Say I’m the one you want
If you don’t, you’ll be alone
And like a ghost I’ll be gone?”

In if i were a boy, the message is clearer. Treat ladies with respect or lose them, only that it just doesnt work that way in this part of the world. Some ladies are stuck due to peer pressure, lack of cash, trips, suitors or common sense! How else do you explain 21st Century Polygamy?

“But you’re just a boy
You don’t understand (Yeah you don’t understand)
How it feels to love a girl
Someday you wish you were a better man
You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you’ve taken her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed”

My advice to single ladies: please work hard and don’t depend on no man. People like Ne-yo do not hide their love for a woman who can live (not just survive) on her own and the truth is the relationship is more open (should I just say balanced) when neither depends on the other, materially?

Video Links

Put a ring on it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mVEGfH4s5g&feature=related

If i were a boy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BVTyLqkez6A&feature=channel_page

Spoof version (don’t put a ring on it) : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kF1VgQh_3nQ&feature=related

Enjoy your Thursday,

1.X

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